Internship

“Excuse me sir, are you done?”

I was only into my fourth cup, and heck, I was just getting started! It said ‘free refills’ out front, didn’t it? So no, Lady! I am not, so please leave me alone; and get me another refill please, while you’re at it?

The tube light crackled and the soda fountain whirred as I stood holding the cup- “free refills also mean serve yourself, mister”- and I wondered for the thirty fourth time, which shade of blue looks the most professional, but not as much as the black.

“Let’s revisit the slides, I had a brilliant idea last evening!” said Jaden Smith, as he walked in office this morning. “Sure thing boss!” I chimed back, summoning forth the best of my fake smiles, from my ever full bag of lies. “The Big Boss is in town next month, and the least he deserves is a professionally prepared update, don’t you think?”, Jaden returned, putting his sweating frappe down on my desk, right next to the coaster I had hopefully set out this morning.

“Of course, that’s what demand planning is all about, anyways”, I said, my response not sarcastic at all, while I refused to think about the messy frappe on my desk, and braced myself for editing version twenty-two of the powerpoint. Sure enough, the water beads had not climbed down to the table by the time Jaden’s temper reached dangerous altitudes; “How many times do I have to tell you to use bright colors! The impact isn’t there! If I have told you once, I have told you enough! I don’t know why I even try with you Will! Have you understood any part of this?”

All the other interns sniggered into their morning coffee and their happy assignments, content that they arrived just in time for the morning dressing down.

“He does have an eye for color, your boss! Don’t you think he should have been an interior designer?”, Jim laughed and told me at lunch, when I recounted my morning to him. He snorted into his salad as I scowled at that, but I had to admit, he was right. All I had done for the last 2 weeks was edit the colors and the font for ‘Volatile Global Demand for Crude Oil and its impact’, and still the powerpoint refused to smell of oil. And it was supposed to do so by next morning, or I could kiss this internship good bye. Not that I really wanted to do this work for the rest of my life, but lately, the economy isn’t helping either. 

Dumping my fourth soda and slamming my laptop closed, I decided to turn in for the night. “No amount of black or blue would make the bloody thing smell of oil, I decided”.

“Are you completely dense? Or just insolent?” Jaden’s mouth was just the right mix of black and blue I should have used, I realized distractedly, as he delivered his good morning to me the next day. “The boss is here and THIS is what we have to show for it? You can say goodbye to this job Will” he muttered, shaking his head and walking into the meeting room.

Looking appropriately humbled, I followed him in the room, and settled at the back, as he began his presentation.

“As you can see sir, I have really slaved over this work for the last 2 weeks, so that we can show you how seriously we are analyzing the volatility in the global demand; and make sure that you leave here with confidence that it is in good h-“

“Something’s smells funny, doesn’t it?”, the big boss interrupted Jaden, and sure enough, the fire alarms went off in the building. On cue, I walked up to the center of the room, put on my biggest smile, and proclaimed happily: “It’s the oil, Sir (burning). The powerpoint reeks of it!”, as the water sprinklers came on.